Bullying effects for all of us…
In my life so far I have been lucky to never have experienced bullying of a severe nature so am I far removed from bullying effects?
I was never the most popular kid in school but I did OK for myself and always had heaps of good friends. My family moved around quite a bit especially in my junior school years and I was lucky enough to make friends pretty easily most of the time.
Like most people I have had the odd occasion where I have been picked on however you would have to classify me in the “No problems with bullying” category! Surely then I would have no bullying effects to deal with? But…
No one is immune to bullying effects…
However the point I am slowly trying to make 
is that it really does not take much in the way of bullying to scar you for life or at the very least, burn memories into your brain.
There was two particular times in my life where I was bullied enough to remember it. Both were around about the same time when I was in about grade 4 and 5 of junior school. We had changed schools again and it was just my luck that a particular boy called Craig who was definitely known as the school bully, saw me as an easy target.
I don’t know what I ever did to Craig but he would punch and hit me on every occasion he could get. Never really flogged me up but just that constant low level abuse. This went on for as long as I was at the school and the memory I most remember is catching the bus home one day. The whole way home he was telling me and everyone else in earshot that he was going to bash me as soon as we got off the bus. I was petrified and wished we would never reach my stop.
Alas of course, we did and as soon as the door opened, I bolted out of my seat, ran down the middle of the bus and ran as fast as I could with Craig in hot pursuit behind me. I don’t know how far I got but sooner or later he tackled me from behind and I remember an almighty fall where I hit the ground face first and rolled, my bag hitting me in the head as well. I was bleeding from my lips and then the hero Craig gave me the best flogging he had ever dealt out to me finally leaving me there on the ground in the park. I still remember it vividly nearly 30 years later! Talk about bullying effects!
The other instance around that time was when two other known school bullies, Brendan and Shane at a different school chose to bash me on the way home. I remember trying to ignore them and walk home however they just kept on pushing and kicking until eventually I dropped to the ground, put my head to my knees and just tried to hide and block everything out. You would think they would let me alone after that however the truth is that they just kept on going and hit and kicked me for I don’t know how long.
After they finally left me alone and went on their way I can remember sitting there in that same position crying and sobbing to myself for what seemed like ages.
Bullying effects from either mental or physical bullying are far reaching…
So that is my story and overall although terrifying for a young boy a few times, my bullying effects are quite minor and hardly even scratches the surface on what most victims of severe bullying have to put up with. Mine was physical bullying however mental bullying can often be far worse and damaging than the physical stuff.
It just goes to show that bullying even on a minor level still has some lasting psychological bullying effects even on a well adjusted grown man (in my opinion at least )
With this in mind we must continue to do all we can to stop the practice of bullying on any level.
The Total Bullying Solution!
As always, “Never stop listening, educating and loving our children.” Always be aware of how bullying effects our children!
Cameron Abel
Hi, I saw this blog as I was looking into bullying preschoolers. My 3 yo girl has a friend that is being physically aggressive and trying to dominate her every time we see her. We are freinds with her parents so I have been given them “one more chance” for a while. The “bullying” has taken place at their house, my house, other people’s home, the bully girl knows to do stuff when we are not watching (e.g. a push here and there, lock her up in the bathroom, sit on her, scratch her nose, take away toys repeatedly). Seems like she behaves better when we meet say at a park (all items that would create discord are removed and we are not in anyone’s territory), so I am considering giving them another chance and carefully observing. But I am inclined to telling her parents that in my opinion, their daughter needs therapy and that we are done playing with them.
Hey Laura, talking to the parents would be a great start as they may not even be aware that their little girl is displaying such behavior. Just remember to try and introduce it tactfully so no one gets straight on the defensive. Stopping it now could help solve a bigger problem later and will also show your daughter that communicating the problems can help fix them. Good luck! Cameron